"What about your own house?" people ask when I tell them what I do. "Do you even have a house?" is another common reaction.
"Yes, I have a house", I explain. "I like it very much". I can see the question in the other's face and so I continue. "When I'm at another person's house, my house sits empty unless one of my out of town friends or relatives needs to use it. Then, I get to have someone else live in my house while I'm living in someone else's house".
But, it is more complicated than that. My house almost always sits empty, unused and fairly idle, not using much gas, electricity or water. Of course, if I'm on a long sit I'll come home every 2-3 days. Pick up the mail, check my email (even if I have access where I'm staying, checking my email at home seems to keep the house 'alive'). I don't stay long and I seldom do any house or yard work. I simply come in and go out. Look the place over and continue on my way.
"Well, can't you leave where you are? my friends also ask. "Do you have to be with those animals all the time?" "Of course", I reply, "I can leave."
But the truth is I seldom want to. And I never like leaving at night. I feel my responsibility too strongly. Many people have pointed out that the dogs owners go out at night from time to time, but I know the value of a regular schedule and the wisdom of keeping trauma to a minimum and so I make it a rule not to go out at night unless absolutely necessary.
It is not an issue. I enjoy the solitude housesitting affords. It has been one of my goals for two years now. To use solitude for refreshment, reflection and creative regeneration.
"How's it working then?" is the enivitable next question.
At this point in a conversation, I see my friend's confusion. "Why not just take your solitude at home and stay in if you want solitude?" they ask. I'm ready for an answer and I give it with a practiced pace, patiently explaining the difference between forced solitude and chosen solitude. Besides, I would finalize, I'm getting paid for it too.
This seems to satisfy most people and we get on with our lives as though housesitting is as normal as any other activity. My friend's fall into two categories. The ones who would never give up their time at home to live in another's house and the ones who wonder what that would be like and applaud me in the adventure of it.
What about my house? My house seldom measures up to the houses I visit and live in for periods of time. Yet, when I come home, when I finally settle back in, unpack and do what I call 'bring my house back to life'. I am so pleased and happy to be in my house, I know it's all worth it.
I do miss the animals though and I miss having an animal of my own to share my house. Perhaps someday, I will.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Living in Someone Else's House - 1
When I stay in another person's space, I first come into the space without my suitcases, food sacks or any other items. I generally spend time talking with and reaquainting myself with the dogs.
Then, I take in the environment. I check out where things are, what space needs to be changed or moved to include my presence and gradually, very gradually, I begin to make it my own. The ease with which I do this is a constant challenge to me.
I live alone (grandchildren and visiting family and friends not withstanding). I miss a daily compainion at times. Housesitting with dogs is a good way to fill that void without having the full responsibility of a relationship with another person or the constant caretaking of a pet.
By the third day it usually happens that the house feels less foreign and more "mine". The dogs are more bonded with me, our routine established. I still keep my own things orderly, watch for crumbs and dust and I put things away exactly where I found them whenever possible. The challenge is to recreate a space for myself while maintaining the homeowner's space for them.
In a way, the house becomes mine. Usually, I spend sometime outdoors as most homes have lovely patio areas, often natural landscapes as well. I especially like to go out at sunset. Watching the light fade, sitting in the quiet at the end of a day always calms me and the dogs seem to like it as well.
We sit and we look. The light changes slowly but always there is more to watch. I feel closest to the dogs at this time. It's as though we share an animal sense of light and shapes and sounds together. We both seem to know when it is over and return quietly to the indoor environment.
I slowly get up and comment "Well, Flora or Buddy or Shadow or whoever I'm with at the time, let's go in." And so the short evening begins. The evening s are short ecause every dog I'vee sat with goes to bed early. Some go to sleep as early as 7:30 and non later than 8:30.
Like small children, there is a relief when the dog or dogs go to sleep. But, like little children, they will get up early too. So, I bgin my own healthy, wealthy and wise routines by going Early to bed because I know it is early to rise.
Then, I take in the environment. I check out where things are, what space needs to be changed or moved to include my presence and gradually, very gradually, I begin to make it my own. The ease with which I do this is a constant challenge to me.
I live alone (grandchildren and visiting family and friends not withstanding). I miss a daily compainion at times. Housesitting with dogs is a good way to fill that void without having the full responsibility of a relationship with another person or the constant caretaking of a pet.
By the third day it usually happens that the house feels less foreign and more "mine". The dogs are more bonded with me, our routine established. I still keep my own things orderly, watch for crumbs and dust and I put things away exactly where I found them whenever possible. The challenge is to recreate a space for myself while maintaining the homeowner's space for them.
In a way, the house becomes mine. Usually, I spend sometime outdoors as most homes have lovely patio areas, often natural landscapes as well. I especially like to go out at sunset. Watching the light fade, sitting in the quiet at the end of a day always calms me and the dogs seem to like it as well.
We sit and we look. The light changes slowly but always there is more to watch. I feel closest to the dogs at this time. It's as though we share an animal sense of light and shapes and sounds together. We both seem to know when it is over and return quietly to the indoor environment.
I slowly get up and comment "Well, Flora or Buddy or Shadow or whoever I'm with at the time, let's go in." And so the short evening begins. The evening s are short ecause every dog I'vee sat with goes to bed early. Some go to sleep as early as 7:30 and non later than 8:30.
Like small children, there is a relief when the dog or dogs go to sleep. But, like little children, they will get up early too. So, I bgin my own healthy, wealthy and wise routines by going Early to bed because I know it is early to rise.
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